okay, so two weeks ago i was walking down the hall at work, minding my own business when i see this woman approaching. she's a tall skinny white girl with dark hair in a really short roundish bob haircut. she was wearing a trendy outfit and was smiling. like really smiling, not just the courteous upturn of corners of the mouth thing you do to people you haven't been introduced to.
but thing thing is, she thought she had. been introduced, i mean. to me.
'hey! how's it going?'
'uh, pretty good. how are you?'
'great! hey, when do you get off tonight?'
[looking confused] 'um, i think 11...'
'oh, that's too bad. i'm getting off at nine. we're all going to hang out at the [bar where everyone goes to chill after work]. you should totally give me a call on my cell and see if we're still there. maybe you can meet us!'
'uh... okay...?'
'great! hopefully we'll see you later!'
i was bewildered. i had never met that broad before in my entire life. i had seen her a couple times, but thought she was naturally that smiley. i ran over to my coworker and asked her to quickly identify her before she rounded the corner, but my coworker didn't look over in time. i was pretty sure the woman had confused me with that new intern from the east coast (who looks nothing like me, aside from the fact that we're both short brown girls with slightly frizzy hair.) dude, i know we all look alike, but still.
later, i asked my carpool buddy, who has been there a long time and knows everyone, for identifying help. she thought it could be one of several people, so i said i'd let her know the next time i ran into the woman.
so today i see that tall brunette bob walking through the cubicle area. i become extremely interested in my computer to avoid a weird interaction, and as soon as she passes, i get my friend's attention and start jerking my head in the woman's direction. my friend nods at me with a knowing look.
fifteen minutes later, i look up and see another, different, brunette bob walking through the desks. to my dismay, i realize that this in fact is the woman who had approached me that day, not the one from before. i run over to my buddy and tell her i was only kidding about the first one, but this one was the real deal.
on the drive home we pieced together who all the characters were. at first i was like what the heck, she can't even tell the difference between two brown girls with long hair! but then i realized that despite all that covert operating to learn her identity -- complete with head-jerking, whisper-shouting and complex hand signals -- at the end of the day i have the very same problem with skinny white girls with brunette bobs.
that moment, to me, was wildly entertaining.
That's not so bad-
ReplyDeletewhat's really rediculous is how in NYC, short girls, tall girls, blondes, brunettes, white girls, brown girls, asian girls ALL LOOK THE SAME!!! (and act the same)
so if you mixed up a few tall brunettes with bobs- imagine if ALL the girls looked the same to you!
Excellent use of "wildly entertaining."
ReplyDeleteI also like how you referred to her as "tall brunette bob." I'm going to start calling everyone with any color bob "bob." I'll let you know how that goes.
funny you mention that, omar. because bob is my favorite name ever. there's just something about the frankness about it. i don't know.
ReplyDeletei love to say, 'no prob, bob' especially to people named robert who hate the name 'bob,' or honestly just to anyone at all.
i might consider naming a kid that, but i think it'd be a tough sell with the yet-to-be-determined husband. just a hunch. so i'll have to settle for using it on one of the plants.
Had never thought of "no prob, bob." Am HUGE fan of "What's the plan, Jan/Stan?"
ReplyDeleteThat moment was just plain wildly entertaining. I guess everyone looks alike to everyone. Is that some comment on the egocentricity of human beings or just a realization that we're all pretty clueless?
Will remember never to bob hair...
Oh, and you're linked, babe, whether you like it or not.
ReplyDelete'what's the plan' is also one of my biggies. thanks, glo; we must be cosmically linked, too.
ReplyDeletelooks like you may have taken the 1,000th look at this blog. quite a milestone for me.
I am ashamed that I have taken until now, 9:20 pm California time to visit. I opened a fortune cookie the other day that said, “You have more influence with people than you realize.” Isn’t that Wildly Entertaining!
ReplyDeleteI’m all too familiar with the, “they all look the same” concept, however, I do pride myself in knowing the difference once I actually meet someone. I’ve never had a conversation in person like I knew someone when I really didn’t. On the phone… maybe… but I think it’s ok to mix up voices, not faces.
And all these sayings remind me of a song… 10 points to whomever correctly guesses which one it is…
dude, that wasn't hard. just drop off the key, lee.
ReplyDeletewhat can i get with my 20 points?
When have I ever said any of my questions were hard? Most of them are quite simple… of course, there’s still another 10 points floating out there for the taking (at least last time I checked) but of the 30 points available, you’ve got 20 of them. Can’t do much with 20 yet… 50,000 gets you a free one way ticket on a greyhound bus to anywhere within your home state though…
ReplyDeletewait. what was the other question besides remo? i'm sorry, but remo was hard. and it was a fluke that i got it.
ReplyDeleteThe other question was actually the first one I ever asked and it was on Jasmine’s blog… I haven’t checked back on it in a few weeks… maybe I’ll have to go make sure I don’t need to add another name to the tote board…
ReplyDeleteYup, 10 points still up for grabs over at Jasmine’s blog…
ReplyDeleteYeah, even I would have gotten that, if you guys didn't have ALL THIS COMMENTING FUN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
ReplyDelete(ahem) Sorry. Didn't mean to lose it.
Omar, never before in my life has it been more appropriate for me to say, “You snooze, you lose.”
ReplyDeleteAppropriate indeed. I've got no comeback for that.
ReplyDeleteyeah, that would have been embarrassing. i always try to get at least the name and face down before getting with anyone.
ReplyDeletewelcome, r.u.!
and omar, it's obv you're not hitting the snooze. is it the boy that gets you up at 5 a.m.?
ReplyDeleteoops only one r in embarassed. i'm feeling sheepish now.
ReplyDeleteThat's 6 a.m. around these parts, and yes, the boy did get me up. Though I'd normally get up for work in the 6:30 range anyway.
ReplyDeleteEither way, that’s an early morning. I’m not much of a morning person, unless I stay up all night, which isn’t exactly impossible…
ReplyDeletei used to love staying up all night. i was so giddy the next few days; it was like a natural high.
ReplyDeleteuntil i ended up doing it because of work. blech.
this is hilarious. wait. i'm sorry. this WAS wildly entertaining. you didn't lie.
ReplyDeleteOmigosh! Number 1000! That's huge. I feel honored and shamed for how long it took me to link you!
ReplyDeleteSo, this is where those crazy conversations went to...jon and omar continue to make me giggle...but how can we solve the time delay??
Before I forget, Cadiz, never apologize for getting something right, even if it is a fluke. Take your points and be happy. Also, staying up all night is the most fun when you probably shouldn’t, if that makes sense…
ReplyDeleteG-Lo: The time delay is easily solved by not sleeping… ever… try it some time.
i try my best to be honest at all times, jazz.
ReplyDeleteyeah, glo, i felt honored. i've been sneaking peeks before work (cutting into my Arthur time, mind you) to keep up with you day folks. but you guys are entertaining.
point taken, mr. j.
ReplyDeletei think i'll saving them points up for that greyhound bus ticket to wauconda. just b/c i like the sound of it. it's like that song, 'ohh yeah yeah, oooowee, WAUCONDA (instead of yolanda) ooh yeah yeah, you look so fiiiine.
Hmmm, I don’t know that song… but that does remind me, at 10,000 points, you can cash in on 10 songs from my MP3 collection that is guaranteed to be filled with stuff you probably won’t like. But I understand the draw of Wauconda…
ReplyDeletei am a woman of eclectic taste. just don't make me listen to death metal. with nearly anything else, you never know...
ReplyDeleteregardless, i have a long way before 10,000 points to think about how i'm going to use them.