So this morning at like 6am, A and I were up on one of the floors of the hospital to see a nurse about a patient, and I spotted one of the members of the Auntie Patrol sitting at a nurse's unit with her nose buried in a chart.
The good little Indian girl that I am (You MUST "time-wish" anyone who is more than ten years older than you after church, no exceptions), I went up to her and gave her a hug. But while she was stunned I took off for the other end of the ward, realizing that if I weren't so well-trained I could have walked right past her and she never even would have noticed me. Damn internal programming.
I called my mom during break and warned her about the run-in so she could prepare. "Oh no," was all she had to say.
A understood the implications of what went down and shook her head about the "way 'the community' works." It's only a matter of time before the rumor mill starts churning and my mom has to deflect talk about about what a shame, with my degree from that live-away-from-home university, it is that I am doing something that has nothing to do with said degree. I reminded her that I am still freelancing in my field and that I plan on more school as soon as I figure out what, and hello, BENEFITS? We don't have to make excuses to anyone. But I hate to have put her in a position where my parents will likely be judged. Because a) they didn't create this craptasticular economy b) letting me follow my own path actually made them better parents c) shit happens.
There's a chance the Auntie Patrol will exercise some discretion and refrain from slinging backhanded compliments about how getting into the medical field is such a great idea, even if it's so late, or casually mentioning that kids I used to babysit are already two years into medical school. But there surely will be commentary out of earshot. Who knows, maybe that's a good thing; it'll take their minds off wondering if my sexual orientation is the X factor keeping me from being married already.
I'm not terribly upset about this, because it's better than having one of them come in as my patient and see that I'm still working out the kinks on my stretcher-parking. Again, I know I don't have to explain myself to anybody. But seriously, what are the odds?
*"Time wish"= saying "Good [morning/evening]/Happy [Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year/Easter], Generic term for relation such as [Uncle/Auntie/Big Sister/Big Brother]." Those kids who did not act accordingly back in the day were perceived as snotty little brats who were not raised properly.
So you're doing the right thing by saying hello, but could be subject to the wrong reaction. That blows, and I'm glad you're standing firm in your job. You'll figure out the stretcher thing soon enough, and in the meantime, I'm sure you make it look like you meant to do that.
ReplyDeleteIm glad that you arent upset about the the run in. People will talk no matter what, and if they dont know the details, they will make them up as they go along. It always sucks the way parents are brought into it, but they have been dealing with/fending off people's mouths for years, the fact that your parents allowed you to follow your own path is a testiment to the fact they won't let the aunties' hot air blow them away. Imagine if you had not said anything and she caught a glimpse of you first, or got an earful from someone else. I think it was the best way to go, almost like yeah - im here - and what? (there's never a answer to that btw)
ReplyDeleteThere are some people, it doesn't matter what you do, they will talk.
ReplyDeleteThey are just plain mean, no matter what you do, they will always be mean.
Think of all this as material for writing.