at least i'm not claiming Post-Its

okay, so the high school reunion spirit committee sent out a form asking for the particulars. you know, name, married name, kids' names, pets' names, address, blablabla. but then they wanted to know other stuff, too. stuff you really shouldn't be trying to come up with when you've been commuting/working for 14 hours on 3 hours' sleep. stuff such as:

favorite song from '92-'96? okay, that's pretty easy. i put "california love" by Dr. Dre/Tupac, but only because one of my friends mentioned it during a discussion on the topic, so i can't even take credit for that. however, i agree wholeheartedly.

what i should have said:
"california love" by Dr. Dre/Tupac


favorite high school memory: i grasped for straws and came up with an all-school coordinated waterballoon fight we had between 2nd and 3rd period during "freshmen hell week." (yeah, i got some great shots in, but we were sophomores then, and had been completely terrorized the year before by seniors who sprayed our hall with waterguns filled with fox urine and cut off random locks, emptying the contents and setting them on fire and having a live pig run amok. security protected the freshman the next year, so we got hazed as sophomores, too. and by the time we were seniors we had no energy to expend on traumatizing younger classes. but the balloon fight was still fun.)

what i should have said:
as my friend, ri, aptly remembered: our senior class trip down the western coast of italy, from Rome to Sicily. seriously one of the biggest eye-opening, horizon-broadening, taste-for-travel-inducing experiences of my life. it solidified my love for Spanish and my persona as the make-sure-your-giddy-friends-don't-do-stupid-shit-like-run-off
-on-a-ferry-with-strange-foreign-men schoolmarm. whatever. say what you will, but nobody got assaulted under my watch.

interesting fact about you:
this one stings the most. let's remember, i was on ZERO SLEEP so it was on my mind. i wrote, "i talk in my sleep." upon further thought, i am now positive everyone else's is going to be "i found the cure for psoriasis" or "i help starving orphans when i'm not improving the quality of anti-gravity space boots." even Mr. High Contrast is going to say he climbed the Himalayas, though we all know he was motionsick and on a donkey.

what i should have said:
SO MANY THINGS I COULD HAVE SAID INSTEAD! i could have talked about camping out in the Sahara with camels (come to think of it, i had food poisoning then too, so i feel ya, highcon.) Or seeing William "refrigerator" Perry perform his part of the Superbowl Shuffle literally ten feet in front of me. or you know, risking my life every night by working in a DUNGEON, for God's sake.

sadly, because of this halfass form filling, i will be remembered as the girl who blocked out all the fantabulous things she actually did and focused on what earned demerits. furthermore, i will be the broad who spent the decade after getting a diploma cultivating her frigging nocturnal oratory skills.

what i should have said:
i STILL can't think of the right thing to say until it's too way late.