Sunday, August 13, 2006

new year, new leaf

"dude are you still working?"

"of course. at this point, must you even ask?"

"i never can keep up with your hours. so what's going on in dungeon duty?"

"a whole bag of nothing."

"oh come on, sh-t load of nothing? tell me a story."

"i sleep, i work, i talk on the phone a little. repeat ad nauseam."

"well, do something about it. at this point you can only move forward."

"yawn."

"cadiz. you have to ask for what you want. and sometimes that means just saying 'i want this' or you'll never get it."

"i'm starting to see that in all realms."

"and i don't mean yell, but 'this is what i prefer.' "

"how about, 'i want to go home. NOW.' "

"within reason. i seriously think you should get on my no complaining program for 28 days."

"NO COMPLAINING? do you realize that is my favorite hobby? my only hobby these days?"

"cadiz, i'm sorry, but that makes you a really depressing person."

"um, you're telling me."

"when i've been at a point where people ask 'hey what's up?' and i want to -- and actually respond with-- complaints, i'm like damn i'm such a downer."

"i realize that, but honestly i think having no life is starting to drive me a little insane."

"cadiz, i realized, the way i was brought up, i don't let myself be happy until 'A,' until 'B,' until 'C'... "

"sounds very familiar."

"and it never ends. and then over the weekend i was like, what if i'm just happy BEFORE anything happens? because honestly none of that stuff actually determines who you are. you're just a good person in one or more tricky situations."

"ugh. i feel trapped."

"don't worry about that. just start exercising 'i want this' or 'i need that.' you might not get it, but that's not the point. your voice is out of shape so you have no idea what you think you want. practice, and you'll know. it's going to feel foreign and weird. but anything you do every day for 28 days can become a habit."

"yeah? i have been trying to take vitamins every day on and off for like 12 years, and that's never stuck."

'cadiz. just try it. you'll see a difference. positivity catches on."

"i want to go home."

"you have to work with what you can actually control. and if all you can think to say is negative, then just shut the hell up. just see what happens."

"fine. i'll try your little trick."

"28 days."

"ok, starting monday. because i still have a lot of bitching to get out of my system and now i've gotta make it really count."

7 comments:

jazz said...

girl, i couldn't do it. i complain like there's no tomorrow....

Radioactive Jam said...

Whoa. Is that 28 *calendar* days, 28 weekdays, working days...? If you mess up do you lose a good day, or do you go back to zero?

And why does the phrase "lose your good days" cause a ripple of unpleasant memories in my head? *shudder*

Modern Viking said...

So we both have a mission this month :) Good luck!

Syar said...

good luck. you're a better woman than I for even agreeing to that. whining and complaining's the same thing right? either way I do both in abundance.

omar said...

I don't complain much at all now, I'm saving it all for when I'm old.

Your friend is wise.

(Anyone want to place bets on how many hours -- I mean, days that cadiz lasts?)

Lia said...

I soooooooooo understand!

Good luck on the no-complaining stint. Let us know how it works out.

Maybe I'll try it for a week. This week. Cuz I'm going on vacation!

Guyana-Gyal said...

Hm. Maybe the key is to acknowledge the problem, find a solution, go for it. Hmmm, I sound like Ale there.