Thursday, June 23, 2005

empty year-marker

today was a day that used to be important, but isn't anymore. now it's just a thursday in june. even so, since the moment i woke up, i was waiting.

to feel something. anything at all.

but nothing came. maybe because for so long i had been doing nothing but feel. i might have overdosed. it's odd. to have the niagara falls of emotions falling out of you for so long, only to have it dried up on the day you were expecting to drown.

i'm not usually much for borrowing other people's words, but i like the very specific, yet somehow general, way she describes a situation.

plus i'm so dumbfounded for not having felt anything, i can't think of what to say.

even more strange -- i was overly happy all day. for no good reason.



perfect girl
s. mclachlan and p. marchand

Am I faithful, am I strong, am I good enough to belong
In your reverie a perfect girl
Your vision of romance is cruel
and all along I played the fool
All your expectations bury me

Don't worry
you will find the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo
knowing that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time


I own my insecurities
I try to own my destiny
That I can make or break it if I choose
But you take my words and twist them 'round
Til I'm the one who brings you down
Make me feel like I'm the one to blame
for all this...

you will find the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo
knowing that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time

'Cause you need everybody with you on your side
Know that I am here for you but I hope in time
You'll find yourself alright alone
You'll find yourself with open arms
You'll find yourself
you'll find yourself
in time


The riot in my heart decides to keep me open and alive
I have to take myself away from you
'Cause I can't compete I can't deny
there's nothing that I didn't try
How did I go so wrong in loving you

Don't worry
you will find the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo
knowing that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time

9 comments:

Jon said...

I love it when I find a song that describes exactly how I feel. )Did that come off sounding pretty girly?)

cadiz12 said...

not till you mentioned it. :)

yeah, she's often dead on. i feel like she stole some of her stuff right out of my head, but said it better. some people say she's over the top, but then again that's what they say about me and my metaphors, too.

omar said...

I agree with what jon said, just in a much more manly tone.

But inside, I cry a little (again, in a manly way) because my homie cadiz finally made a song reference that I don't know. (More than a reference, actually, I guess it's the whole song.) Must go buy it on iTunes...

Andy said...

Sarah often has a way of dragging me down further. Not a bad thing, but sometimes not a good thing.

Ale said...

cadiz- sometimes its the best feeling in the world NOT to feel-
you're right sometimes we all just overdose and its a pleasant and welcome surprise not to feel at a moment that we are stressing about dealing withe the feelings that we are dreading will surface--

cadiz12 said...

i know, sarah can be too depressing for some people. my roommate used to groan when she walked in to me playing it (but secretly, i think she got used to it). i tend to feel better listening to sad music. sometimes the sadder, the better.

don't worry omar, i'll probably put some Common on later.

ale, i think you're right. it was scary, but liberating.

Lia said...

Music is awesome for expressing emotions. And I like the sad music. I don't know, it makes me feel better somehow.

I just met your blog, and you've already made my favorites list.

Gloria Glo said...

I love Sarah. She's deep, and her words carry the emotion of the song. Yes, I tend to listen to her when I'm a little down, but I also have several of her songs (Push, and Train Wreck) that get me through happy times as well.

cadiz12 said...

trainwreck is one of my favorites.
that album resonates with me (except maybe world on fire).