Wednesday, June 01, 2005

typecasting

1998:

'if you really break it down, there are two types of women: the girl you want to have as your wife and the girl you want to have as your mistress.'

'that's crap.'

'yeah, but that's the way it is. i'm struggling with the idea that i'm the kind of girl who's going to be the perpetual mistress.'

'don't be silly; of course you're not. just stop talking to boys who are taken. i want to be both. why does it have to be so black and white anyway?

'let's be realistic. it's not, but if you take away all the messy details, it all boils down to something like that. in my experience, guys are just out to have a good time. but you -- sorry -- but you're totally the wifey type. you just have that domestic vibe.'

'what the hell are you getting at? are you saying i'm boring? excuse me, but you happen to think i'm damn fun to be around. and you know about my allergy to doing dishes. what's with you?'

'no, i meant it in a good way! the wife is the one who gets all the respect, the security, the commitment. the mistress is all about the moment.'

'sounds like a hell of a commitment if he's freaking cheating on you. where did you hear this crackass theory anyway?'

'some guy at a bar.'


2005:

'i like variety, but i kind of like a little routine, too. you know, like seeing the same people at the coffee shop every day or passing the same security guard at the end of the night. it's comforting.'

'you would make a good wife.'

'huh?'

'you like routine. that's what wives are about, right? like laundry, cooking, etc.'

'wait a sec. you're saying that because i like enough continuity to be able to know the guard's name, that automatically means i should be doing some guy's laundry every saturday morning?'

'well, that's what it's about, isn't it?'

'your mother spoiled you rotten, didn't she.'

'...yeah.'

17 comments:

Ale said...

oh my goodness... don't EVEN get me started...

Anonymous said...

Akshay:

How are you Cadizji? How was memorial day weekend for you?

mine was fine and I need a permanent holiday

yes , yes we desi kids are utterly spoiled by our parents. Not just spoilt, spoilt rotten.

I want to move to somewhere where I can afford a live in help or make enough money for that.

geez, have you seen some of the homes in India? 10 maid servants, 5 chefs, etc etc. I remember this one house where they have 5 chef's and a ton of maid servants. One of the chefs is used strictly for vegetarian cooking.

Ahh well, one can only strive for that dream.

cadiz12 said...

servants would make me feel too guilty. i need to live in a smallish house -- less for us (emphasis on team) to clean -- so i can have a racecar and take nice trips.

Jon said...

I feel like I missed something on this one…

Racecar = cadiz12’s priorities are in order. I’m with you on the servant thing. Guilt, plus I would never know where anything was. I don’t think I’m messy, I just have a level of organization that is so complex and sophisticated that to the naked, untrained eye, it might seem like a mess, but it’s really not. I wouldn’t expect anyone to know the difference, so when the help “cleans up” my “messes,” in effect, they would just be completely un-organizing all of my stuff. Then I’d come off looking like a scatterbrained freak that can’t even remember where he left his shoes. I can’t have that. Plus, I’m not really that comfortable with people touching my stuff all the time. I’m sure there’s some medication I could take for that, but I’d rather not.

Ale said...

its true, it would be weird having servants... i'd be so paranoid that they're gossiping about me... (as they show in telenovelas on univision) also, they would all propbably be pissed at me for not giving them enough juice to gossip about.

ok, honestly though, i am SURE i'd be able to get used to it all.

maids are vicious too... once they sense that you're scared of them, they'll do things on purpose to make you feel stupid...

jazz said...

i know other guys that have also categorized the women into "marrying types" and "booty call types"

hate that. i don't want to be either.

cadiz12 said...

'the one' will realize there's simply no need to look further because what they've got is the best of both rolled into one...even after 15 years.

however, many people out there really believe in the other theory. people who watch sopranos even get sucked into the mentality that it's okay on some level.

girlspit said...

I'm with you. I struggle to be the "cool wife." I try not to nag, and I want my husband to have fun, with or without me. However, "fun" does not include sex.

Poker night with the guys, trap shooting at his buddy's farm, going to a movie with a male friend: all fun things I want my husband to be able to do.

Picking up random chicks, hiring an escort, sleeping with my friends: all things he is not allowed to do. We both think this is fair.

Marriage is not a social contract in which men get housekeepers. It's a serious, lifetime commitment to another person. People don't think about that enough before they take vows.

omar said...

Geez, girlspit. No sleeping with your friends? No escorts? Why not just give him shackles?

Modern Viking said...

I think I may have stumbled across a solution to the conundrum... Marry a foreigner. When cultures clash everything is exciting, even the routine stuff.

cadiz12 said...

nah dude, people from other countries grow up with a whole different set of expectations. they might expect you to do all the work and go by all their rules. i want to be on a level playing field.

though it's awesome to learn about culture from an expert. they always know the best restaurants and can teach you how to do stuff without looking like a fool.

Ale said...

not true cadiz- abt foreigners expect you to do all work and go by their rules-- maybe a foreigner is SPECIFICALLY looking for an american girl, that will act AMERICAN and do NOTHING! :)
so depends on the person

cadiz12 said...

from which country can you find a person who expects you to do nothing? book me a ticket.

cadiz12 said...

if i had let that guy have his way, he'd probably try to get me washing his socks within the first six months. hmph.

Modern Viking said...

Yeah, different expectations can be a problem... But I guess that's part of the deal, both people have to give up their expectations and go with the flow.

Andy said...

To classify women into either sort of category I feel is somewhat demeaning. Personally, I don't feel the need to pigeonhole women into categories other than the ones I like (romantically) and the ones I don't...

Maybe I'm just old.

Again, from a personal standpoint, if there is respect in the relationship, then these sorta things cease to matter.

girlspit said...

Ok, I admit it. I am a bit of a slavedriver, but he likes the handcuffs.