Wednesday, August 10, 2005

mojo of marriage

monday night after a dance workshop, the copychief, our girl rayray and i went out for a drink. (ray is the one who had the unfortunate incident with the jetski, but is on the mend and recuperating nicely.) she hasn't been able to dance yet, and we've missed her. so despite the embarassment, it was great to have her heckle us from the sidelines. that girl needs to bottle her energy and positive attitude and sell it. then we could all lounge around on a sailboat in the caribbean.

so there we were, walking into the corner bar, cc and i stanky and sweaty from working our tails off. we must have brought in a dancefloor aroma, because as we entered, every single person at the bar turned around. i know for a fact that i was a spectacle, because it was humid, so the top layer of my hair was fanned out in a halo around my entire head in tiny curls and i was sporting a raggedy t-shirt that said 'car wash '78.'(hey, it's class, what's the point of fancy gear?) the other two, of course, still looked human -- if anything a little rosy. we sat down.

'can i start you ladies off with something to drink?'

we're buried in the menus, trying to decide if we should get a snack, too. CC's dying of thirst and orders a lemonade and ray and i are trying to decide whether we should get alcohol and if so what and how much. no one has noticed that our server is extremely attractive -- think tall, lithe, blondish simon rex from his days on 'what i like about you.' we place our orders and get back to gossiping.

when the server comes out with the drinks, he walks all the way around the table to place CC's lemonade in front of her. he puts down my and ray's drinks and gets them mixed up, but doesn't bother to notice.

S: were you guys in a class at the school? [nods his head toward the street where the studio is.]

R: yeah, we were at dance.

S: oh? what kind? salsa?

CC: no. hiphop.

S: very cool. i take a class too. salsa.

i perk up, because i looove salsa.

Cadiz: really? at the school? i didn't think they offered that.

S: no, it's at xyz studio. you know, salsa is really a very intimate, sensual dance.

ray and i look at each other. he pretty much just directed that at CC. what audacity. i look at her hand and remember she tends to take off her engagement and wedding rings for class so they don't get beat up from floorwork.

Cadiz: wow. so do you need a partner before you sign up?

S: no, you pretty much find someone there. but you have to be lucky to get a good one. [obviously my interest in his dance studio is taking a back seat to his interest in my friend. he turns to her] so hip hop, huh? you guys must be pretty good.

Cadiz: these two especially. (ray's been dancing her whole life and cc just got accepted into a troupe)

R: [points to cc] she's awesome.

S: i believe it, you're so cute.

at this point, my jaw drops to the table. i've seen pickup moves, but that's BOLD, man. and i let it hang there, too, because my back was to him. i was thinking too hard about closing my mouth, so i didn't hear how she recovered. (most likely by telling him she was married; she's always very quick to point that out). he went away.

as soon as he was out of earshot, it was on.

R: ohmygod, cc, he was SOO HITTING ON YOU!

Cadiz: no shit! and he's hott, girl. you still got it.

R: but seriously, Salsa is very sensual?!

Cadiz: i know. dude, he's got it bad.

CC:[blushing] shut up, guys.

Cadiz: Ray, you have no idea; i can't take this girl ANYWHERE! last month we went to [hoochie-foochie lounge] after the breaking battle and this one gets us out of paying cover because the bouncer liked her smile.

i proceeded to tell ray about the multiple times that CC has gotten us offers for breakfast, breaks in line or out of cover and the time that guy who tours with kanye told her that her husband was blessed. cc rolled her eyes.

needless to say, we were still talking about our adventures into the parking lot. she points out how it's so weird because the honking and whistling only happens when we're either really dressed down or all nasty from class. when we have our A game on, we may as well be furniture.

i admit it -- i am a little jealous of this girl's mojo. three girls, two of which are single, are out for a drink but the one with the ring is the one who gets sweated. of course she's smart and beautiful, but i can only hope there's more to the magic. my scientific hypothesis?

if you are married, then you will be sweated when you go out.

now if wasn't so damn tricky, i would've already gone ahead and done it. for scientific research, of course.


Ale said...

cadiz- its so backwards but its sooooo true!! and i guess the way "they" (doctors) explain this fenomena' is that males can sniff out the "smell of sex" on the feemale and it attracts them. Has nothing to do with how many showers you take, but they apparently can see it in your eyes, your skin that you "do it". sounds very animal kingdom, but apparently if you want to find a boyfriend you need to start dating someone immediately so you can start looking.

lucasjackson7 said...

isn't it funny that we describe people in this manner: no one has noticed that our server is extremely attractive -- think tall, lithe, blondish simon rex from his days on 'what i like about you.' ?

And I have to admit the honking and whistling are inate features of the male pysche.

Also, today's word of the day: "sweated".

omar said...

Your hypothesis is 100% true. And it works both ways, it's not just men sweating married women.

Ale said...

you know what they say on the upper east side in NY? -instead of "i'm sweating you" - "i'm shwitzing you" ;)

cool cat said...

pray tell, would you care to CLARIfy the source of our little one's mojo?!
same thing: free drinks, no cover, straight to the front, etc...

and just wait until you hear the vegas stories!


MEP said...

That's so true Oman - girls always are attracted to guys who are married and happy. I think they are attracted to his percieved stability, loyalty, and willingness to commit to someone. Maybe even restores their hope that their IS true love out there.

Now, attraction to a married man who is sleazing and hitting on other women may indicate disfunction . . . .

cadiz12 said...

so the sweat from class smells like getting it on in the pheremone world? that doesn't make sense b/ci was the sweatiest one there.

yeah, lucasj, but you knew exactly what i meant, didn't you? this kid had that same simonrex comes-to-a-point-but-not-a-mohawk hairdo. and it was cute on him.

maybe married people are just more confident because they don't care? maybe it's not that the guy smelled anything on her, but he might have smelled single-ness on us?

cool cat, only a divine power can explain what it is that makes people do what they do. i'm just as in awe as you are. hope you had fun!

yes, married and looking = bad news. hi MEP!

'ka said...

her sweat makes wonder, huh? :D