Thursday, October 27, 2005

long ride home

it's like this world series hoopla puts my office and all of its work-doing on pause. people standing around tvs, making choruses of awwws and OOOOOOOOOOOOHs. time stops for baseball, i guess.

as happy as i am for the white sox, (which i am, YAY!) world series = late nights for this dungeon girl.

late last night, as i waited at a red light at the entrance to the highway, an older homeless gentleman, who sometimes stands on the corner with a sign, came up to my car. i gently shook my head no at him, but he stopped about three feet away and motioned for me to roll down the window. i rolled it down a crack and he said, 'hey there young lady. now i just want you to know that when the white sox with the series tomorrow, it's going to be mayhem out here on the street. you'd best stay inside, and not too late.' i shook my head in agreement like a little girl and told him to take care as i drove off.

i have no idea why, but even as he was talking, tears were sliding down my face. now sometimes i tear up when i'm nervous, but the sight of that poor old guy, nose running from the cold, holding his sign under his arm with just 'meless' showing and not even asking me for any money made me incredibly sad. it is a sad situation, but what's sadder is that my time in the city has deadened me to it. i'm not sure if that's a bad thing, but from the stutter in his voice and the concern in his eyes, i'm pretty sure the guy wasn't completely mentally stable. a lot of people on the streets aren't, and they don't get the care they need.

last time he spoke to me was a few months ago when he asked, 'what is a little girl like you doing out so late?' (it was 4 a.m. when i was getting off work). i told him i was working and he told me to be careful because there are a lot of bad people out there. granted, i was very careful, knowing that he could very well be one of those bad people, but i just got the feeling that maybe he was remembering some girl in his life or his past when he was talking to me.

where is she now? why isn't she taking care of him?

by the time i got it together and made my way home, not one, but TWO animals ran into the street. the possum i managed to avoid, but i think i clipped the raccoon with the edge of my bumper because i looked and there was no body. tears again.

and then when i got home, the dvd du jour was about how the heroine finds her mother lifeless and slack-jawed on the couch, dead. the way it was shot, with no background music, really got to me.

lemme tell you, there never really is any kleenex around when you need it.

6 comments:

neena maiya (guyana gyal) said...

There never is enough Kleenex to wipe all the tears in the world.

Folks here are always amazed at the fact that there are homeless people in wealthy countries overseas. We think it's just a 3rd world thing.

Lia said...

I think living in NYC has jaded me a bit - I don't think I would have rolled down the window. I would have been too scared.

Of course, I wouldn't have been in a car, and on the subway, people talk to you all the time, but mostly you just do your best not to make eye contact and to ignore them.

It's important to remember that homeless isn't always a synonym for bad and dangerous.

Unknown said...

GG they are all mentally sick here!
-there is no NEED for anyone to be homeless living on the street- they choose to do it! there is PLENTY of AID from the government should you choose to received it!!

-cadiz- i think this story is a perfect illustration of the EVILS of the modern world... where your JOB takes up most of your time and brain capacity that it leaves you completely separated from the rest of the 'real' human world!!! thus- you in a car at 4am by yourself... the people who snap and refuse this "system" get CUT out from the world and end up alone anyway-- thus- the homeless man- all alone-

where is the girl that he is thinking about?? - i'll tell you: she is sitting somewhere in an office - KISSING up some corporate ass!

that's how its going to be- that's why so many people "jump ship" and buy a banana boat move to the islands, grow a beard and give scuba lessons to pale, fat- office workers that are able to still away for a few days.

the trick is to make your money, and why you do it- dont forget the initial plan to - get THE HECK OUT the moment you made enough!!!!

ok- i'm done now-

jazz said...

you need to give that guy some money next time you see him.

Unknown said...

no- give him an address to the nearest Welfare office! he needs to face his problem not prolong it

cadiz12 said...

don't worry; i have some cash tucked away in the change drawer for when i see him next.